


Hope and Duty

by Kitty Rainbow (KittyRainbow)



Category: Artemis Fowl - Colfer
Genre: Angst, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-09-21
Updated: 2003-09-21
Packaged: 2017-10-04 20:31:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/33836
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KittyRainbow/pseuds/Kitty%20Rainbow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Artemis' world is falling apart before his very eyes. Someone else has to put the pieces back together for him, before he falls apart too.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hope and Duty

"How is Mrs Fowl?" enquired Butler as his little sister stormed into the room.

"Not good," came the reply. "She won't open the door at all. I even made some hot chocolate for her, but I had to leave it outside because she wouldn't let me in." Juliet sighed and rubbed a hand across her forehead. "I just went back and it was still there, stone cold."

Butler shook his head slightly. "Maybe she'll be better in the morning. They'll have found Mr Fowl by then." He kept his thoughts to himself as to whether Artemis Fowl the First would be discovered alive or dead.

"What about Artemis?" Juliet suddenly asked. "Is he holding up okay?"

"He's in his bedroom, but he hasn't locked the door nor taken any vows of silence or starvation."

Juliet nodded and sighed again. "There isn't much we can do to help. Whatever happens, we'll have to let them work through it." She paused for a moment. "I'd better get to bed, it's already eleven o'clock and I need to be up early to do some vacuuming." Juliet leant down and kissed her brother goodnight, then left him to sit alone at the kitchen table.

After a whole minute of listening to the deafening echo of the clock, he got to his feet. There was no point in him sitting around and stewing. What would come would come and there was nothing he could to stop it. He should go to bed as well - but first he would check in on Artemis.

The boy's room was on the next floor up. Butler silently padded up the grand stairway and along a corridor. There was no movement, no sound around him. Everything was still. There was no life in this house; tonight it was an empty shell.

"Artemis?" he whispered as he arrived at his charge's bedroom door. There was no reply. He pushed the door open slightly and called again. "Artemis, I'm going to bed now, but if you need me don't hesitate to wake me up." A muffled sound came from beneath the mountain range of the duvet. It didn't sound like an acknowledgement, it sounded like...

Like Artemis was crying.

Butler opened the door fully and walked right up to Artemis's bed. He wasn't sure if he should be doing this, if it was his place to do this, but there was nobody else. "Artemis," he said softly, placing a hand on the bit of duvet under which he guessed was Artemis's shoulder.

A full second passed before anything occurred. Then there was a shifting and a head slid out from beneath the covers to look at him. It had Artemis's black hair and deep blue eyes, but somehow it didn't look like him at all. His eyelids were puffy and his nose was a little red. There were tear tracks down both cheeks. And his eyes... Usually they were so reserved, drawn back from the emotional side of life, analysing, calculating, observing. But now they were full to the brim with tears, all walls broken down and forgotten. Was this the real Artemis? It was more terrifying to behold than the eleven-year-old who had worked out how to rob a bank.

"Butler..." came a small voice, cracked and vulnerable. It was a statement, not a question, not anything that Butler could respond to.

"Artemis," he replied simply.

The young boy moved, sitting up slightly and looking at him. "Oh, Butler, why is this happening?" Another tear slid down a pale cheek.

"I don't know, Artemis. Sometimes things like this do happen."

"But why did it have to happen now? And to us? And why does it have to hurt so much?"

Butler didn't know what he was supposed to do. What could he say? There were words that Artemis desparately needed to hear but he didn't know any of them. "I don't know, Artemis." He shrugged slightly. How inadequate he felt.

"Butler..." Artemis faltered. It didn't seem like he could find the words either. "Butler, how do you do it?"

For a moment he was confused, startled. "Do what?"

"You aren't curled up in your bedroom, crying your eyes out. Neither is Juliet. Why?"

Butler sat down on the edge of Artemis's bed. "Because we're Butlers, I suppose. We're trained to fight, not to feel. From the moment we're born we're already being trained in the family business. Violent deaths are nothing new to us." Butler's uncle, the Major, had been on the Fowl Star too. Whilst Artemis Fowl the First was still missing, the Major's body had already been found.

"Even to Juliet? There's only four years between her and me. Is she so strong? Or am I so weak?"

Weak. Artemis, weak. No, those were two words that did not go together. Maybe Artemis didn't realise it, but he was strong. His intelligence and critical mind had led him to believe that any emotion was weakness. No, that was not the case. Emotion could be strength too, but Artemis didn't understand that.

"No, Artemis, you are not weak."

He could see that Artemis didn't believe him. Like everything else the boy was feeling at the moment it was written all over his face. Then, quite unexpectedly, Artemis crumpled. He screwed up his eyes, flung his arms up to hide his face and began to sob.

Butler quietly reached out an arm and encircled Artemis's shoulders. "Hush, Artemis, hush." He didn't want Artemis to stop crying. If he needed to cry then it was better that he did so. But the shushing was a calming noise, one that said "I'm here for you". Or so Butler hoped.

For two minutes, Artemis wailed uncontrolably. Butler simply held onto him, trying to give him the support he could get from neither his father, his mother nor himself. After a little while, Artemis began to calm down. His sobs grewer quieter and fewer; his tears fell less often. Finally he was silent. He had slid back down under the bed clothes, lying flat again. Butler's hand had crept back to his shoulder again.

"Butler." Barely a sound came out of his mouth. "I'm so afraid."

"You have every right to be. But remember that they haven't found your father yet. He could still be alive. Until they find him, you don't know that he isn't out there somewhere."

Something that was almost a frown flitted across Artemis's face. His eyes began to water again but he blinked the tears away. "Will you stay with me," he asked, still so quiet and frail, "Will you stay with me until I fall asleep?"

Butler nodded and Artemis rolled over, his bodyguard's hand dropping from his shoulder. Now he was facing away from him, looking at the wall instead. But Butler supposed that he needed a little privacy. Soon Artemis's breathing slowed and became regular, but still Butler sat by him and watched.

And then, in the morning, when Artemis came down to breakfast, neither of them mentioned anything that had happened in the night - not Artemis's raw heartache, not the faith which he needed Butler to give him and not the empty sleeping bag which had still been on the floor when Artemis awoke at nine o'clock. Their eyes met just as Artemis sat down at the kitchen table with his plate and for a moment he thought Artemis was going to mumble a thank you. But the look in the boy's eyes was unspeakable.

It was more than enough to know that he had been there when Artemis had most needed him, and that meant the world to both of them.


End file.
